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The Author
Robert Scott lives and works in Asia; born in England I have since lived in Canada, Hong Kong and Singapore. I now work mainly in Bangkok.
If you want to know more you only need to ask! ask.
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31 August 2004 The demise of the South China Morning Post is one of the sadnesses of modern Hong Kong. It is now more like China Daily than China Daily! The mandarins of Beijing will have been delighted by yesterday's front page banner headline - "China leads Asia into a new era". Too much. ************ In flight to HKG. The brave man in 17D has just requested that 18C turn his music down. Personal headphones are either not very personal on Cathay or he likes his music very, very loud. Probably defective headphones. Anyway brownie points to the chap in 17D ******************* Heading out to BKK airport and waiting at lights on Sathorn/Rama IV there was a guy weaving in and out of the traffic on his scooter. He used one hand to steer the bike. The other hand was clinging onto his pet poodle. The poodle did not have a crash helmet. An accident waiting to happen. ********************* The Beckhams will have a third child next March. Good for them. The best game now will be guess the name ! Rebecca is definately not an option. 30 August 2004 The governor election is over and Khun Apirak has won comfortably. Do not mistake this for any great re-emergence of two party politics in Thailand or of any great revival of the Democrats. Golf report from yesterday - 36 points in the stableford; out in 41 shots (21 points) at President but lost the plot a little on the back 9. Could not put and played the par 3s like a donkey! Good day out and a good group to play with. 29 August 2004 There was a huge rat (truly) outside my local 7-11 this evening !! Like me, he was probably looking for a drink ! Someone has to explain to me why the governor's election means that the bars have to shut for a whole weekend and even hotel restaurants cannot sell a drink ! Polling finished at 3pm on Sunday; but bars were not allowed to see alcohol until midnight; and then they would have to shut at 1am! No alcohol could be bought or sold on Saturday either. Even the 7-11s and stores were not allowed to sell alcohol. 26 August 2004 This week's specials in the restaurant in my apartment building include "Pork Rice Noodles with Fourticals." I have no idea what fourticals are; I searched yahoo but it cannot find this word anywhere. It sounds a bit like an unnecessary body part! 24 August 2004 One of the most unpredictable features of our office building in Bangkok is what music will be played over the loud speakers in the men's washroom. I adjourn there with the newspaper for a few minutes quiet contemplation only to find that I can be listening to: the 1812 overture with full sound effects; the flight of the bumble bees; christmas songs in june; kenny g (the worst of all); or today, acid jazz !! 23 August 2004 I was walking through Lumpini Park with a friend yesterday. It was almost 5pm and the aerobics classes are getting ready. In one area near the lake she listened to the music and then said this must be where they do Issan Aerobics; as the instructor arrived the music changed to Kylie Minogue....that well known Issan favourite. ************** Arsenal 5 Middleborough3 : there was a time when watching Arsenal was as riveting as watching paint dry. Not now; 1-3 down and looking suspect in defence they simply stepped up a gear and played thirty minutes of stunning football. Wonderful entertainment. It depresses me every time I see the so called fans of opposing teams hurling their foul yobbish abuse at the likes of Thierry Henri (the Man U fans at the Community Shield were ugly). They are privileged to watch a great talent in a great team that play compelling football. 22 August 2004 Very down this weekend. No golf. No one to do anything with. Elgar on the cd player. Rather melancholy. Scary thought - the Americans have a habit of naming their navy ships after US Presidents. How about a USS William Clinton; that would probably be a big sucker !! Better still a USS Hillary Rodham Clinton. You read it here first. It is a feel good day in England; a hat full of medals yesterday at the Athens Olympics and a 4-0 white-wash of the West Indian cricket team. Winning is a good habit. 21 August 2004 Everyone in Thailand is now a weightlifting convert. Two gold medals from Thai girls in the weightlifting events is a terrific achievement. Paweena Thongsuk won yesterday's medal. The bar that I was in went wild. Better still she beat two Russian competitors - at least one of whom must be shaving regularly ! Though I am a bit worried about the expression clean and jerk! Is that what happens in a Chuwit massage parlour? 20 August 2004 I was at the driving range last night. Could not hit two decent shots in a row. I hooked and I shanked. But not a bad word passed my lips. Meanwhile the Thai girl next to me at the range was swearing like a trooper; as things deteriorated she moved from the s word to the f word. She would then have a cigarette to calm her frayed nerves. Life is too short to get that upset about a little white ball. ******************** It is raining very evening in Bangkok; traffic is heavy and going out in the evening becomes wet and frustrating. Now would be a good time for a holiday! 14 August 2004 The opening ceremony of the Athens Olympics is underway on TV. I doubt we will here much more of the Greek National Anthem during the Games! There was a wonderful opening scene of water and fire. Very simple. But my Greek mythology is very poor ! Expect a Trojan Horse sometime tonight - hopefully without Brad Pitt. I wonder if the Chinese will allow a Taiwanese team to participate in four years time? I must remember to tell you about today's golf - later! ************************************ I spent yesterday golfing at the Bintan Lagoon Resort. There are two courses here; the seaside Jack Nicklaus course and the woodland Ian Baker-Finch course, although 9 holes on the Baker-Finch course are under renovation. This really is a fun day out because everything is made so easy. Pricing is simple. Monday to Thursday S$115; Friday S$130 and Saturday S$160. This includes ferry to Bintan, transfers to the golf course; 18 holes of golf, a caddy and a compulsory power cart. For another $30 you can also play the back 9 of the Baker Finch course. And you will be well looked after. I checked in at the Tanah Merah ferry terminal and did not see my clubs again until I got to the starter area at the course. The resort pre-arranges the visa on arrival for anyone that needs it. And they have an fast track arrangement in Bintan which allows you to jump the queue at immigration and get to the course quickly. My caddy was extremely pleasant and spoke excellent English. She also spoke a little Japanese, Korean and Thai. That is the result of four years of caddying for tourists. I was on my own and set out to play all 27 holes; a friendly Taiwanese 6 handicapper joined me for the last six holes; which made me play some decent golf. He was in Bintan on honeymoon; and is taking his new wife to Pattaya next week! Taking coal to Newcastle! The courses are now well matured and are in good condition. I left my clubs with the caddy. And did not see them again until I reached Singapore. Meanwhile I had a shower followed by a cold beer. It is a full day out; the ferry takes an hour each way. But it is great value and a truly good day out. ************************** I was supposed to be golfing with a friend; but I had not realised that some people still regard the evil empire as more important than friendships. 12 August 2004 Working with a small company is very different from my working days in the evil empire. There people came and went at their choice or the Company's on a regular basis. Leaving parties were a regular event and were a courtesy to attend rather than heartfelt. Maybe that is a bit cynical but it is not wildly inaccurate. In Bangkok our project has maybe twenty staff including friendly consultants. It is a close community where we need each other's support; where friendships are formed and where all our personal lives are better known and more happily shared than in a larger company. We have a wonderfully creative and energetic Thai team and parties bring out the best in them. Yesterday's party will live long in the memory of everyone that was there. Everyone got involved, everyone was there because they wanted to be, it was clever, it was sincere and it was fun. 8 August 2004 I was going to get on my hobby horse and get all upset with the Chinese after their defeat by China in the Asian football Cup final. They treated the Japanese fans and players with derision and there were ugly riots in the streets after the game. But nothing worse than how British fans behave and just as intimidating as South American fans. The only issue with China is that there are so many more of them. And did I mention that the deciding goal was clearly handball. A touch of the Maradonas (see how long English football fans carry a grudge). Again a great case for using video to help referees. Welcome to Planet Football. *************************** And talking of football we now know what Sven Goran Eriksson is good at !! In today's tell-all News of the World Faria Alam says: "Sven really cared about my fulfilment. He made sure I enjoyed multiple orgasms before he satisfied himself. I fell for him totally. He was a master of the art of love-making." Seems that Sven has been scoring regularly; which is more than can be said for his team! ***************************** I saw the new Tom Cruise movie "Collateral" on Friday night. It is long and too predictable. More importantly I said sorry to a friend. 7 August 2004 I would vote for whichever Bangkok governor implements a minimum speed for trollies pushed around supermarkets; or had aisles wide enough that there are enforceable fast and dawdling lanes!
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6 August 2004 There are 22 candidates for the Bangkok governor election to be held on 29 August. The ballot system works by putting a cross next to a number not next to a name; so your have to remember your candidate's number rather than his or her name. The city's streets are littered with candidate's posters. Chuwit has the most imaginative posters; seven different posters of his looking in a stern corruption busting mood. In one he looks severely constipated ! His poster campaign is estimated to have cost Baht 20 million. Chalerm is all over town as well. Looking very austere and traditional. The baby-faced Democrat, Apirak, looks schoolboyish by comparison. Pavena cannot be seen on street posters. But she is prominent on the back of vans and taxis. But the names ill not matter on the day. Just the right number. "I am not a number" 30 July 2004 Nok Air - No Care !! Oops. Hopefully it sounds better in Thai. 28 July 2004 As part of its marketing blitz Nokair has its staff running around BKK doing promotions and singing the company song....presumably the chicken dance ! To encourage a unique (thankfully!) corporate culture all staff must address eachother as "Nok". So I would be Nok Robert (many people have tried to !). It must be tough if your nickname is already Nok...Nok, Nok !! "This is your Captain Nok..." 27 July 2004 A postscript to the Canadian election - only 60.5% bothered to vote. The second biggest vote, behind the Liberals, was in fact the apathy party - the no voters. If you cannot be bothered to vote then you get he government that you deserve. *********************** Another note from a visit to the Canadian embassy. There are instructions on what sort of photograph is acceptable for your passport photograph. In keeping with Canada's dour image you must not smile for your passport picture. ************************* And in a waiting room at the Canadian embassy that has all the charm of a dentistry the most recent newspapers are the Nation from the 21st and 22nd of this month; five days old. 25 July 2004 I had a hair cut on Friday. Now I know this is not big news but it is a strange experience. My hair cut starts with a hair wash - and this lasts ten minutes with two washes that go on forever and some conditioner. And then as soon as it has been washed then 3/4 of what was washed is then cut off. My hairdresser is a lovely lady but she does not cut my hair - she shears me ! And then what little is left is then washed again. Rather odd ! 19 July 2004 A list of the worlds' top 100 wonders is at this link. You may not agree with the list but it would be great to be able to say been there and done that ! http://www.hillmanwonders.com/ *************************** More dislikes or personal rants; Men with whistles. Is that the
only way they will ever get attention? People who stand at the top or bottom of escalators having a conference about which direction they should head in. 14 July 2004 Another delay in updating the website while I take a few days in Penang. One thing I had not expected is how well Penang has marketed itself is a Muslim friendly destination for Arab visitors. Makes for a very interesting collection of guests in the hotel and in these troubled times maybe just a suggestion that we can all get along. The jet skis here at Batu Ferringhi beach are a noisy polluting menace. The hotel advises against sea swimming due to jelly-fish. The jet skis are a greater danger. Copy dvds, vcds and music are openly available in the local market. The police presence is merely to direct traffic! RMB10 about US$2.70 buys a DVD. 6 July 2004 Am in Phuket which is why this site will not update until Friday. We are in the south between Karon and Kata beach. There is much to enjoy about Phuket but some things are always unpredictable: The hotel has no TV in the rooms; but there is a big screen TV in the hotel lobby; where tonight as family entertainment you can see "Kill Bill". Not exactly something I will take my 7 year old to see!!! Rumoured to be Monica Lewinski's favourite film! A print out from the hotel's horrible internet access is Baht 15 a page !! Highway robbery ! Generally I would guess that Phuket prices (at least at the tourist areas) are double those of Bangkok. 1 July 2004 Wow; half way through the year already. Khun Chuwit, Bangkok's massage parlour magnate has an impressively upscale hotel on Sukhumvit Soi 24. One piece of advise; do not eat in the restaurant. With more than a little irony there was a large corporate group there last night eating the buffet....their t-shirts sporting the logo of the relaxer massage chair !!
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